Kissing a non-smoker is like licking a rotten potato.

How many times has a partner with bad breath ruined your intimate experience? If they were a smoker, the ash and nicotine would have covered up the fowl odor in their mouth.

In 2000, 78% of people over 17 had active tooth decay, 1 out of 2 people had gingivitis, and of those with gingivitis, 80% had destructive gum disease. Over 95% of these cases were unaware of it (http://www.amsa.org/programs/gpit/oral.cfm).

Take up smoking; it feels a lot better and looks cooler than brushing your teeth.

If you already smoke, don't stop. People would rather lick an ashtray than slob on a rotten potato, trust me. Anybody who says otherwise is just jealous because they're incapable of breathing smoke out their mouth like a dragon.

Plus, if kissing a smoker is really that bad, just skip foreplay. Contrary to what anti-tobacco campaigns might say, fucking a smoker is a lot better than rubbing your dick in an ashtray, trust me.

I don't smoke cigarettes, but if I did, I'd hang out downtown all day long inhaling tobacco, busting slick poses, and nodding at people. Everyone would look at me and think, "What a badass, I bet he finishes smoking and porks some hot chick."

At work when the restaurant is empty, all my coworkers lounge around laughing and puffing on cigarettes while I sit alone and figit in the corner. I try not to look jealous but I know they look at me and think, "What a loser; he' just standing there. That guy is obviously going nowhere in life."

Man, I wish I smoked.

Anyone too sissy to smoke a cigarette probably shouldn't because they don't deserve the right to.

Smoke cigarettes. It looks hot, makes your breath smell better than it normally would, and gives you something to do.